The #FWOC #senioryear edition has come and gone for me, and how s w e e t it has been; it still feels as if all of it is unreal, as if I am waking up to life in one of my dreams. Wearing my nursing polo, khakis, and black shoes along side many of my closest friends is such a b r e a t h t a k i n g feeling; being able to pose in a group picture with my 31 other classmates gave me my feeling of v i c t o r y . Four, five, and six months ago I was s t r u g g l i n g to survive through my challenges; how quickly can God change things around into something b e a u t i f u l . It is still hard for me to believe that I am actually standing in a position that, not six months ago, I thought was for sure to be impossible. I continue to be overly thankful to my God for giving me grace and blessing me with a very unique opportunity; because of his overwhelming love and mercy, I am choosing to enter this semester, one which is to be filled with extra c h a o s , with an excitement I have yet to possess.
L e t s G o
While my #FWOC has come and gone {and been pretty awesome}, my beautiful partner in crime has yet to begin her new journey in the crazy {but pretty awesome} world of college. Because this year is our round two of #seniorfreshmansisterstatus, I wanted to explore five different things I wish I could go back and tell my freshman self.
1. Don't try to "fit in"
Three years ago was the first time I was ever "new" to a school; making friends and "fitting in" were my biggest worries, while having to do it all on my own, without my sister or my parents, made it even more nerve wrecking. It seems as if those times when you don't feel like you "fit in," or when you don't have an established "friend group," that you feel most uncomfortable -- my mind raced to what I wished I had most, someone to call "best friend," a friend group which made me feel as if I belonged.
Don't settle. Because my decisions have shaped who I am today, I could not bear to go back and change anything, but I would encourage myself to not settle for anything. Don't settle for friends who do not take you to the next level in both academic terms and spiritual terms. Don't settle into the same rudimentary schedule; randomly grab a cup of coffee with a new friend or randomly hit the gym and try a new workout routine. Don't settle for average, don't settle for having an 'okay' day. Do what it takes to make each day unique and exciting. Don't settle for "fitting in," you can be so much more than what you are limiting yourself to when you try to "fit in."
Know that sometimes, a core group of friends takes time to find. It took me two years to find my core group of friends. Yeah, I wasn't the typical college student who becomes life-long best friends with her freshman roommate. It took me until my junior year, until I began my major's courses, to finally truly feel like I "fit in."
What does "fitting in" feel like, like, I mean the 100% "I totally fit in" feeling? Well, you share a lot of the same interests; you are intrigued by the same material, such as medical material; you have similar personalities, when you get together, you feel as if you are finishing each other's . . . sandwiches! You have similar goals, such as the end goal of a finished and successful research project. And on top of it all, you enjoy the company of a good cup of coffee among all else. "Fitting in" means you are comfortable to talk about defecation during a lunch meal; "fitting in" means you don't have to worry about "fitting in" and becoming someone else. "Fitting in" is full of trust, love, laughs, tears, hugs, and joy. And when you click, you will realize that you never really "fit in" as much as you "fit in" now. When you 100% "fit in," you don't have to try to "fit in," it just, kinda, happens.
2. Never sacrifice friends, or academics, for boys
Oh the amount of wisdom you can learn from relationships with boys, and it seems as if advice never is sufficient enough; that you have to experience it yourself in order to never fall victim to it again.
I have a friend who is not from the state. Well, the college that I attend is not a very popular one at that, in fact, many people from around the state are not even aware of the small town which my college resides. So, how does a girl from Illinois make it all the way to a college which barely makes it on the map of North Carolina? simple. . . a boy.
Well, her and that boy are no longer together, and when you ask her what brought her all the way to NC from IL, she will go ahead and tell you "a dumb boy." Well I am personally thankful for this "dumb boy" bringing her all the way from IL and us beginning nursing school the same go-round, because if it weren't for him, I would have never have met and gotten to know such a beautiful soul.
Never sacrifice friendships for boys. I know your mother has told you this before, but there is a huge probability that your friendships will outlast your opposite gender-seemingly intimate relationships. When you sacrifice hanging out with your girlfriends to kiss a boy instead, it may seem enjoyable within that moment. But later down the road, that boy is going to move on to kissing other girls, and you may end up sitting on your bed, thinking about all your regrets, including giving up a friendship for an ex-boyfriend. Never sacrifice anything, your emotions, your time, for a boy who doesn't encourage you to spend time with your friends or who keeps you from your friends.
Never sacrifice your fundamentals for anyone you hardly know. Don't become a "flip flop" in times of new excitement or new challenges; don't say one thing one day and then say the exact opposite two days later. Your fundamental beliefs are labeled as "fundamental" for a reason. Don't rid them away and become someone who you are not in the name of "fitting in" or to feel important. You don't need to become someone else to be important, you are already important; your life is full of purpose with you being you.
Never sacrifice your fundamentals for anyone you hardly know. Don't become a "flip flop" in times of new excitement or new challenges; don't say one thing one day and then say the exact opposite two days later. Your fundamental beliefs are labeled as "fundamental" for a reason. Don't rid them away and become someone who you are not in the name of "fitting in" or to feel important. You don't need to become someone else to be important, you are already important; your life is full of purpose with you being you.
3. Don't settle for just 'good grades'
Go to all the football games your freshman year. Watch all the volleyball games your heart desires, even if you end up sitting by yourself in the bleachers. Sure, good grades are worth the sacrifices, right? Go for it, but when you are a senior and you look back on your college career, you may wish you spent more time during your less-challenging semesters doing more fun stuff, like building tents and playing cards in the campus ministry center until one in the morning, or becoming active in a club of your delight. Do things that you enjoy but that will also add to your resume and make you stick out from the crowd -- you don't want to fit in!
Expend some energy and stress through running or weight lifting or yoga; there will come a point down the road where you may not be able to do these things for an extended period of time where you may find yourself staring at individuals running through the neighborhood with jealousy. Never take the little things for granted, you may not realize until later how much fun your missed out on just through sacrificing the "little things."
4. You are the average of the people with who you surround yourself
Make a list of what you want in a best friend, of what you want in a significant other and become that.
Surround yourself with people who have your drive, who desire to have straight A's, and feel just as bad when they miss their test grade goal. Surround yourself with people who make you laugh.
You will adopt some of the habits of your friends, just as they will adopt some of yours: trade negativity for optimism; trade complaining for excitement. It is important to observe and analyze your friendships and be sure you are becoming someone who matches up with that list.
5. Always strive to be better
But never place your worth in your failures. Being ambitious can be a strength, but can also be a weakness; when you don't meet up to your set expectations and fall short of your goals, your drive to be better can dare to pull you down. Little lies can begin to circulate through your thoughts telling you that you are not good enough. Your desire to be better can become your downfall.
Always strive to be better, realizing that you are human and you are not perfect.
but remember, there is always someone better than you
When you do succeed and meet your high-strung goals, do not become proud. Always stay humble, knowing that you will never be "the biggest fish in the sea." There is always someone better than you, more knowledgeable than you. But don't let this piece of information discourage you, only let it be an encouragement to continue through life with humility.
Yes, there is always someone 'better' at whatever it may be than you, but that does not mean you have a free pass to stop trying, to stop fighting, to stop living, to stop thriving. God created you for a reason, and although you must remain humble throughout your journey, never believe Satan's lie that because you are not perfect that you do not have purpose; being imperfect does not equal purposelessness.
Most importantly, remember your purpose.
Why are you doing all of this? Why are you going to college? Why do you continue to study and try to do well? Why do you keep on getting up every morning to continue through this journey? Why is all of this important to you?
Your end goal is to not help yourself.
The meaning of life is to find your gift; the purpose of life is to give it away. 
